Fitting Into the Puzzle

Question:​​ ​Why​ ​do​ ​we​ ​have​ ​a​ ​habit​ ​of​ ​living​ ​"OUR"​ life​ ​to​ ​fit​ ​the​ ​standards​ ​of​ ​the​ ​ones​ ​we​ ​love instead​ ​of​ ​the​ ​way​ ​WE actually​ ​want​ ​to​ ​live? 

We​ ​put​ ​aside​ ​the​ ​things​ ​we​ ​like,​ ​love​ ​and​ ​aspire​ ​to​ ​do​ ​and​ ​actually​ ​monitor​ ​how​ ​we​ ​do​ ​things because​ ​we​ ​fear​ ​the​ ​thoughts​ ​and​ ​opinions​ ​of​ ​others​ ​(MAINLY​ ​the​ ​ones​ ​we​ ​love).​ ​The​ ​reality​ of the​ ​situation​ ​is​ ​that​ ​when​ ​you​ ​truly​ ​love​ ​someone;​ ​it​ ​can​ ​be​ ​a​ ​significant​ ​other,​ ​friend​ ​or​ ​family member,​ ​sometimes you'll​ ​do​ ​anything​ ​for​ ​them.​ ​This​ ​results in​ ​losing​ ​yourself​ ​trying​ ​to​ ​love someone​ ​else​. ​This​ ​can​ ​happen​ ​intentionally​ ​but most​ ​times​ ​we​ ​do​ ​it​ ​without​ ​even​ ​noticing​ ​we're doing​ ​it.​ ​​Truthfully​ ​the worst​ ​/​ ​unhealthiest​ ​thing​ ​you​ ​can​ ​do​ ​is​ ​lose​ ​yourself, in​ ​this​ ​process​ ​of​ ​loving someone​ ​else.  

Understand​ ​that​ ​it's​ ​okay​ ​to​ ​make​ ​changes​ ​here​ ​and​ ​there,​ ​sacrifices​ ​and​ ​compromises​ ​for​ ​the ones​ ​you​ ​love​ ​but​ ​those​ ​efforts​ ​should​ ​ALWAYS​ ​be​ ​matched.​ ​We​ ​all​ ​have​ ​flaws​ ​and imperfections.​ ​We​ ​all​ ​have​ ​habits​ ​some​ ​good,​ ​others​ ​bad.​ ​But​ ​when​ ​someone​ ​chooses​ ​to​ ​love you​ ​they​ ​must​ ​love​ ​and​ ​accept​ ​ALL​ ​of​ ​you.​ ​You​ ​cannot​ ​pick​ ​and​ ​choose​ ​the​ ​pieces​ ​of​ ​someone you​ ​want​ ​to​ ​love​ ​and​ ​if​ ​you​ ​do,​ ​you​ ​will​ ​ultimately​ ​end​ ​up​ ​putting​ ​that​ ​person​ ​in​ ​a ​position​ ​to​ ​keep making​ ​changes​ ​to​ ​be​ ​with​ ​you,​ ​which​ ​will​ ​in​ ​the​ ​end​ ​...​ ​hurts​ ​them!​ ​This​ ​intertwines​ ​so​ ​much​ ​with caring​ ​what​ ​others think​ ​about​ ​you​ ​and​ ​not​ ​just​ ​random​ ​people​ ​but​ ​the​ ​people​ ​you​ ​actually​ ​love.  

When​ ​you​ ​lose​ ​yourself​ ​or​ ​monitor​ ​your​ ​life,​ ​you​ ​miss​ ​out​ ​on​ ​so​ ​many​ ​opportunities​ ​and honestly​ ​the​ ​worst​ ​feeling​ ​has​ ​to​ ​be​ ​looking​ ​back​ ​on​ ​your​ ​life​ ​wishing​ ​you​ ​could've,​ ​should've​ ​or would've​ ​done​ ​certain​ ​things​ ​or​ ​done​ ​them​ ​differently. Honestly,​ ​it's​ ​so​ ​easy​ ​to​ ​focus​ ​on​ ​the​ ​chatter​ ​around​ ​us​ ​instead​ ​of​ ​shining​ ​light​ ​on​ ​all​ ​of​ ​the good/happiness​ ​we​ ​are​ ​currently​ ​experiencing​ ​or​ ​could​ ​possibly​ ​experience.​ ​That​ ​negative energy,​ ​attitudes,​ ​and​ ​thoughts​ ​can​ ​become​ ​extremely​ ​toxic​ ​in​ ​your​ ​life.​ ​I​ ​know​ ​it's​ ​probably pretty​ ​cliché​ ​to​ ​say​ ​"always​ ​try​ ​to​ ​find​ ​the​ ​good​ ​in​ ​the​ ​bad",​ ​but​ ​it's​ ​true.​ ​Dwelling​ ​on​ ​negative energy​ ​and​ ​misfortunes​ ​only​ ​bring​ ​unneeded​ ​and​ ​unwanted​ ​stress​ ​in​ ​your​ ​life.​ ​I​ ​believe​ ​that​ ​you have​ ​to​ ​endure​ ​the​ ​rain to​ ​eventually​ ​see​ ​the​ ​rainbow. 

Understand:​​ ​"You​ ​can't​ ​control​ ​everything.​ ​Sometimes​ ​you​ ​need​ ​to​ ​relax​ ​and​ ​have​ ​faith​ ​that things​ ​will​ ​work​ ​out.​ ​Let​ ​go​ ​and​ ​let​ ​life​ ​happen." 

NOTE:​​ ​“The​ ​reason​ ​people​ ​find​ ​it​ ​so​ ​hard​ ​to​ ​be​ ​happy​ ​is​ ​that​ ​they​ ​always​ ​see​ ​the​ ​past​ ​better 

than​ ​it​ ​was,​ ​the​ ​present​ ​worse​ ​than​ ​it​ ​is,​ ​and​ ​the​ ​future​ ​less​ ​resolved​ ​than​ ​it​ ​will​ ​be.”​ 

​-​ ​Marcel Pagno