"The Ride or Die"

Being a “ride or die” for the person you love should never take away from your value or worth as a person. You DON’T have to endure endless amounts of pain/hurt to receive your happily ever after. To me riding for my man means that I am down for whatever is in his BEST interest. I’m down to help you become a better person not watching you make decisions that YOU and I both know are going to cause me pain and put you in an unfortunate situation in the long run. Women get so accustomed to giving more in the relationship than they are receiving but you should not have to accept consistent BS to FINALLY or EVENTUALLY get your happy ending.

Too often do women settle for roles other than the “girlfriend or wife”, like being his MOM instead of his girl. A relationship is a partnership. Understand that when you become that “temporary” crutch for a man he becomes permanently crippled. If you allow him to become comfortable in his ways (things that you don’t like) cheating, drugs, etc. he won’t feel the need or urgency to do better because he has a permanent safety net. I’m a firm believer that men only do whatever you allow. The worst thing a man can do is feel comfortable in his BS.

When a man finally decides to straighten up, you’re burnt out emotionally and physically. You’ve literally burnt yourself out trying to change a man, get him to appreciate you and see yours with. Then it makes the relationships harder because the insecurities from the mistreatment start to bleed through. You can’t even be happy because you’ve poured so much of you into someone else.

I do believe we have to teach people how to love us but that person also has to be willing. Everyone screams communication is key but what is communicating without comprehension. Often times we end up “nagging” or almost begging a person to treat us the right way. Your significant other must be cognizant of your love language and little things that make you happy. When a person is really down for you, they notice every little thing about you without you even having to say anything. I watched the interview with Nipsey and Lauren London. Most of the questions were answered off of pure observations. When you truly love someone, putting in the effort to make them happy is not a chore it actually becomes enjoyable.

Love is tricky and very complicated. Honestly, dating in this generation makes it even more complicated because everyone is so accessible meaning they can lay beside you and have access to their next pick (instagram, twitter, dating apps). No one wants to compromise. All great things come with time and that includes love and relationships. A healthy, loving and strong relationship takes time and a lot of sacrificing pride. The most complicated decision I think we endure in today’s dating is deciding when to stay or let go, fight or move on, sacrifice or stand up. We have normalized so many things that make dating hard.

So when you find your “ride or die” ensure that they double your happiness on all levels.