Removing the Mask

In the early stages of our life we matriculate protected by our caregivers until the day comes where we must face the world and everything that comes with it. All your life you've heard people tell you "It's not that big of deal", "be yourself" "don't worry about what others think or say" but somehow you do care, and it does matter.

As a coping mechanism you began to form protective barriers and those often come in the form of masks, hiding our flaws, insecurities and ultimately who we really are. The mask is our safe space, our comfort zone. It helps you move through the world being liked, even loved by everyone around you except for the person in the mirror. So question. Who do you see when you look in the mirror? Is it the bad ass chick on instagram with 500 likes, a dope style and a smile that brightens up the world? Are you the unbothered person who has their shit together and just seems to keep winning at everything you do? Or are you the person that's the "people person", everyone loves you? Well actually you're none of those people but you've hid behind your mask for so long and all of these identities have become a part of you.

"We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing some of our own skin." – André Berthiaume. So let's dive in a little deeper. Presented to me were 3 different masks. The chameleon, the normal mask, and the everything's okay mask.

The chameleon mask is a mask that you put on to change who you are depending on the situation. Are you the woke African American woman, with a degree, loves trap music or whatever the case may be but when put in a certain setting you KNOW how to put on your mask. When in an interview you change your voice and hair to seem more appealing or "educated" because we all know natural hair is not "a thing" in the corporate world. When you get on instagram you're the girl boss that has everything figured out and all of your business is in order but when the mask comes off you're actually just a normal person with your thoughts and goals scattered, nothing figured out but you have a crazy work ethic. Are you the strong, popular, well dressed and nonchalant man or when the mask comes off are you the scared, hurt and insecure man just wearing a mask.

The "Normal Mask" is when you try to hide something about yourself because you are afraid of what others may say. WAYYYYYY TOOOOO OFTEN do we hide things about us, our past and experiences. I see some of the most successful people painted across the media but they wear a mask afraid to say that they grew up in poverty, have witnessed systematic oppression or an actual "struggle" because you're at the top and everyone around you has a silver spoon so you feel compelled to hide your roots. Are you the guy on instagram with 5K in every picture and a different female every week because you" got it like that" but underneath that mask you're broke, unhappy and struggling day to day but instead of getting a job you suffer and hide behind a mask because you have an image to uphold. Are you the person that yearns for the companionship of someone that looks exactly you but when around everyone else you're dating someone you don't even like to cover up the feelings you have deep inside.

The last mask is the "Everything's Okay" mask, which means you might be hurting inside but instead of reaching out for help, you try to struggle through pain alone. Feelings, emotions, pain, hurt all of this how do we deal with it? Some people cry, some people channel that energy into something positive or negative, but MOST people just keep it inside and put on that "Im Okay", "Im fine" masks. We are all dealing with our own problems day in and day out. Are you that happy energetic person with just a happy soul but at home when your mask comes off your not happy, you're actually suffering from depression. Are you the LIT person ALWAYS down for a turn up, shots on shots and down for drinks only to try to wash away the pain you are truly experiencing inside. When the drinks are gone, the music calms and all you have are your drunk thoughts, the masks comes off and you find yourself crying and no one can figure out why.

Your experiences, your flaws, your perfections and imperfections MAKE YOU WHO YOU ARE. SO understand it's okay to love and BE TRUE to YOU!